To Arnold
What you talkin’ ’bout ARNOLD?!!! Yo Terminator!You need to stop goosestepping up to the gubernatorial race because you have to terminate your campaign. What the fuck is wrong with you? Bodybuilding is alright and everything, but you are not doing multiple reps, you are making multiple missteps. I got nothing against Austria. I got mad love for Vienna Sausage and shit, but you need to stop grabbin’ on ladies and wipe that steroids eating grin off your face. All these women came forward to talk about how you were harassing them, and will not say their names because they are afraid you are gonna fuck them up like Sarah Connor. This is way worse than Clarence and Anita. We are not talking about a pubic hair on a Coke and unsolicited movie reviews of Long Dong Silver. You didn’t get some head from a hot and willing intern, you molested ELEVEN women who did not show you some thong to pump you up, and if it is just six that had the bravery to step up, then I suspect there are a lot more waiting in the wings getting the courage up to call you out What I see in you is testosterone od, and if you don’t get yourself into some x chromosome management program, you are going down. You don’t need to check yourself because you have already wrecked yourself.
What up with the Nazi shit? If there is one person you cannot give a shout out to, it is Hitler. Nobody wants to hear about that. I understand that your father was a Nazi, and I don’t blame you for that, because you didn’t choose the family you were born into, unless you did it on purpose because you are from the future. How can you stand by the remarks about how Hitler overcame a lot of obstacles in his rise to power - like he didn’t have a formal education. What?!!! He didn’t need a Ph D to kill six and a half million innocent people, perpetrate some of the worst crimes against humanity ever known, delegated the most awful shit to the ultimate posse comprised of evil motherfuckers from the other side of the river Styx - the most dangerous ‘hood in all mythology, gave genocide a new #1 single, dupe the German people into thinking he was doing something good, invented the Volkswagon, gave vegetarians a bad rap and commit suicide like the coward he was when he got caught. He wasn’t even a good artist!!! Thomas Kinkaid could kick his ass. I shudder to think what Hitler could have done if he had a degree - or even got his GED. Talk about political scandals. You don’t have Donna Rice on your lap, it is Eva Braun. You need a total recall right about now, before you get elected, because people are stupid enough to vote for you, and all this shit coming down on you now isn’t a smear campaign. It is the media actually doing society some good for once by giving us the truth that your publicists have been being paid to sit on for years. I don’t give a shit about the OUI magazine stuff. Orgies to me do not reflect on the moral fiber of a human being. Plus OUI was a mad 70s publication anyway. It seems like a cross between LIFE and Hustler. I know you are thinking “Arbeit macht governor”, but it ain’t gonna work fool.