The True Colors Tour rocked Oklahoma City Monday night and we all had a blast. It was a killer line up with Girl in a Coma, Andy Bell, little old me, JOAN JETT AND THE BLACKHEARTS!!!, the B-52s, and of course beautiful genius Cyndi Lauper. I love this tour and how it is just an amazing rock show with all these great bands and everyone coming together to show their support of gay and lesbian rights and equality for all.

I went on when the sun was still out, so I sweated almost all my makeup off. Joan Jett and the Blackhearts were right after me, so it was a real treat to get to watch them. Joan is incredible and gorgeous and she rocks so hard it shakes my bones! She is truly a rock icon and living legend and one of my favorite people and looks best when she playing hard and has glistening sweat dripping off her rock hard abs! She is so hot that she turns everyone’s head, even the gay boys! One adorable gay boy I was flirting with, who was the personal sweet gay boy groupie of Girl in a Coma, said she was so gorgeous that he had to catch his breath every time she walked by. Everyone is in complete love with her including me but I am first because I have been in line for the longest…I am talking about since The Runaways.

After the B-52s set, their tour manager asked Joan and I to come to their dressing room. He said, “The Bs would like to meet you.” I love that on tour they are called “The Bs.” It is very rock! So Joan and I went to visit and we all took pictures and everyone took a turn being in the middle, and of course I don’t have any to show you but maybe I can bribe one of them to give me one later.

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The True Colors tour made a stop at Radio City Music Hall last week and it was incredible!!! I am not hosting the show this year, but Carson Kressley is doing an awesome job as host, which is great. I think it is the hardest job on the tour, because you have to keep the audience entertained between the set changes and you never know how long anything is going to take. Carson had them all cheering and I especially liked all his fabulous wardrobe changes between each act.

I love True Colors, and I forgot I wasn’t the host this year, because at the end of The Cliks’ rocking opening set, I ran out on stage to make out with Lucas, as is our tradition from last year, and I got yelled at by the stage manager for disrupting the show! I love the lineup this year, which includes many of my absolute favorite artists like The Cliks, The Indigo Girls, Wanda Sykes, Rosie O’Donnell, Tegan and Sara, Regina Spektor, the B-52s (!!!!!!!!!!) and of course the wonderful Cyndi Lauper.

Later in the night, Cyndi asked me to go on right before her so I ended up being in the show anyway. I was totally nervous because I was following the B-52s, who I have loved since I was a kid. They were my idols growing up. I remember lying in bed listening to late night interviews with them on the radio, about how whenever they went on tour, the real show was happening in the audience, with people dressed in all kinds of crazy outfits and the biggest beehive hairdos ever. They said that two women came backstage with plastic crabs and other crustaceans stuck in their beehives. I dreamed that one day I might actually be able to attend a B-52s concert and be able to see the beehives up close. I got to do even better by meeting the whole band and sharing the stage with them. They sound incredible and look beautiful and are a treat treat treat!!!

My “official” appearance in the true colors tour will be in Oklahoma City on June 23rd, but don’t be surprised if I show up unannounced at other dates – most likely Berkeley and possibly Seattle. I have a little time on my hands these days because I am taking a bit of a break from the Beautiful tour and my new TV show, which will start airing August 21st.

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Here is my latest video, for The Cliks‘ song, “Eyes in the Back of My Head,” shot during the True Colors tour in Las Vegas, Denver, Salt Lake City, Chicago, Berkeley and Los Angeles. Featuring: The Cliks, Diana Yanez, Amanda Palmer and me!

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Here is a shot I took of Andy Bell of Erasure at their show at The Grove in Anaheim on Saturday. Erasure are the greatest! I miss seeing them every night on the True Colors Tour.

I still can’t believe True Colors is over, but I did get to open for Erasure in Anaheim. Look at how cute!!

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Me and Lucas:

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When the record “She’s So Unusual” came out, it utterly changed my life. I was completely head over heels in love with Cyndi Lauper, this tiny, twinkling little songbird, with titian red hair and a crimson corset, wearing more belts than I could count, looking like a fox on fire, with this VOICE that you knew you would always be with you from that moment on. I just wanted to marry that voice. Cyndi was so beautiful I would weep when I watched her on “Friday Night Videos.” It was like she turned the color up on my life, saturating me with blues and reds, corrupting the blackness of my early teenage moods forever. I loved her then and I love her so now. It is funny how you can idolize someone and then you are lucky enough to come to know them and they are your friend and then it feels like you have been friends for the whole of your life.

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Pics by Diana Yanez:

with Knox Chandler

with Rosie O’Donnell

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Taking a little break. On my way home finally. I am really excited about doing laundry. My whole bag smells like a clump of seaweed that you would really avoid stepping in on the beach. Like with dead jellyfish and garbage all in it.

A few words about ‘trannychasing.’ I am not a trannychaser. Ok, actually I am a trannychaser. No I am not. I am a trannycatcher!

Just kidding!

I don’t mean to sexually objectify trangendered people, I am just glad FTMs are becoming more visible within the queer community at large. I think that the ‘t’ in LGBT gets left out too much, and so I love to see that there are great changes underway. I love to talk about gender. I love people who define their own gender instead of letting biology and society define it for them. You are brave and amazing and inspiring and I want to hear your stories and know your heart. I love to talk about pronouns. I love the discourse and the passionate politics. I love female masculinity and butch women, for I am a true femme through and through, even though I may not always wear high heels, and I can’t resist you and couldn’t even if I tried.

Sometimes things get taken way out of context, especially when you are a comedian, and I will try to be more careful about it. I don’t want to be misunderstood and I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. When you see me, come over and hold my hands and look into my eyes and know my love is real.

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My feets is hurtin…I have some wide ass feet. They are beautiful, with a graceful arch of instep and a dramatically deep sole, and dainty also, because I wear but a mere sliver of a size 7, but my feet are W-I-D-E and shit and so they are somewhat Fred Flintstoney, with the width holding all of my weight steady. I could start a car with these wide feet. I could drive down to my local brontosaurus rib restaurant and order a rack of them and have my whole car tip to the side. Girl. I got some wide ass feet. And then, with the wide feet that I have and the insanely uncomfortable shoes I wear sometimes, you know I got corns. Oh my corns on my wide feet, which hurt more or less depending on the weather! I can’t wear a narrow shoe, but I can tell you when it is going to rain.

We are now in Houston, and playing to these big Texan crowds have been amazing. They are loving us, and the line to meet and greet The Dresden Dolls snaked all around the entire venue. They are very loved in the Lone Star State. It is funny because we imagine that Texas is conservative, but so far I haven’t seen much redness or redneckism. Just lots of gorgeous people having fun!

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I have been working so hard, on my feet so many hours a day, running back and forth hosting this huge show and shooting footage in between for The Cliks and The Dresden Dolls that my clogs died. Look at the chip in the heel! It is fucking wood and shit and it is chipping! I got new clogs. And now my old clogs are in the garbage.

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More photos by Diana Yanez…

The Dresden Dolls:

The Cliks:

Erasure:

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More photos from the road, by Diana Yanez and Andy Bell!

at The View

at Radio City Music Hall

Amanda Lepore and me

Beth Ditto and me

Amanda Palmer and me

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The Boston and Atlantic City shows were awesome. In Atlantic City we were joined by The Gossip! I love them! They are incredible!!!

And last night in Boston, Rufus Wainwright brought his adorable stars and stripey looking band to the show. I love him!! I love everyone.

Photos of The Gossip, by Diana Yanez:

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More photos from the road:

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Diana and I walked around the Borgata until we found some True Colors crew…Yay! This is us partying in the B Bar. What are all those orbs and smoky images? None of those were there when we were in the bar… hmm….ghosts at the bar?

I am not tired anymore. Now I am homesick, which is weird because I travel all the time. But I haven’t been home in a while! I miss my family and I am having a hard time sleeping without my dogs! I put all these pillows on top of my body at night in order to replicate my dogs’ sleeping bodies, but it isn’t the same! Oh why don’t they have dog prostitutes! What about dog groupies?! I am sure that there are some dogs out there who are big fans of my work and would like to sleep with me!!!!

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