I have the best partner on “Dancing with the Stars” – Louis van Amstel! He’s an incredible dancer – a world champion many times over, he’s gorgeous, he’s hilariously funny, he’s a great teacher, he’s gay (which I love love love love love love – girl – he is FAMILY)! I couldn’t ask for a better person to pair up with. And what is really cool is he is a fan of mine too!

We have been rehearsing daily for hours, and I am so fortunate because he explains things so well, he makes it fun, he really makes me sweat and I am loving every second of it. His body is so perfect. The way he moves is truly inspiring. And he is helping me move! I wish I could show you the small routines he has taught me now – because I cannot believe I am doing them myself. Even two steps together feels like a miracle to me. When we are in sync and dancing together, it feels like we are flying. I have never felt graceful or elegant, but under Louis’ strict teaching, I feel like my body is changing, even after just a few days. My body is starting to seem like it knows where to go. We are starting to build momentum – something is happening. At first, I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t do it, and then suddenly, I can. He repeats the movement until it gets under my skin, and doesn’t judge when I fuck it up. When I fall, he picks me up and we start again and then I don’t fall. I spin. I turn. It makes me feel alive. It makes me feel like my body is here. It’s 41 years old, and it’s fucking fantastic.

It’s wild to discover new things about yourself at this age. I thought I knew all about what I can do. I really am finding so much out, with these sweaty, sore hours spent in the dance studio. I don’t really think about the fact that this is all a competition, I am just so happy I have made a new friend. I am glad that I am lucky enough to have someone show me the beautiful movement I have inside. I cannot wait to dance with him for the world. Thank you so much Louis!!! I am so in love already!!