I attended a big awards dinner honoring the incredible Ilene Chaiken, creator of “The L Word.” Normally, I hate those Hollywood industry functions. The gift bags are never any good, the chicken is really dry, the night drags on and on, there are always people there you donâ€™t want to see, they never give you enough water so everyone has terrible breath, Tom Sizemore is at your table, the valet takes a ridiculously long time and costs an arm and a leg and $10. I donâ€™t care if the Gyllenhaals are attending. I donâ€™t like going to the West Side for any reason. I hate Hollywood â€“ the kind that these evenings represent in their full, blazing blandness, lack of color and dearth of intelligence.
But this night was different. It was being thrown by Power Up, an organization representing lesbians in the industry, honoring those who have made great strides for women in this business and nurturing new talent among their ranks, so like, I knew everyone there.
I got to see the lean, wondrous, crush inducing frame of Jane Lynch, as she received her award for being amazing in show business. Elizabeth Ziff of the iconic and astounding Betty was there, as she is also a producer of “The L Word” (and who I have had a crush on for about two decades), as well as her crushy sister Amy Ziff, the jaw droppingly crushy Sarah Shahi, who plays Carmen on “The L Word” and of course the Crusher herself, Jenny Shimizu.
It was a fun night, and I got to see lots of people I hadnâ€™t seen in forever, which was really nice. AND I got to meet the new cast members of “The L Word” (who are going to break my heart even further?) and present the Artistry Award, Power Upâ€™s highest honor, to Ilene.
“The L Word” is the best show on television. Not only is it groundbreaking, it is provocative, heart-wrenching, sexy, funny, whip smart, sexy, profound, exciting, political, moving and sexy. It has the most interesting characters ever, and the best actors of our generation playing them. AND â€“ it is about lesbians. Shakespeare must have been a lesbian because we invented drama. I am all about my own drama just watching “The L Word.” It burned me up inside because I knew that bad Tanya killed Danaâ€™s cat, and I couldn’t do anything about it, so you can imagine my intense surprise and relief at Alice and Danaâ€™s kiss at the end of season one. I become fiercely protective of the characters, because I think they are my friends! I was so mad when Mark put those cameras up in Shane and Jennyâ€™s house, I almost called the police. Thank god Tina moved back home, and the scene where all the girls are holding little Angelica and welcoming her to the world had me crying the whole night, and then tearing up the next day every time I thought of it.
Before “The L Word” comes on, I go to the bathroom and take off all my eye makeup, because why bother? I know I am going to cry and the mascara will flake into my eyes and Iâ€™ll probably get conjunctivitis if I donâ€™t take precautions. I cry when happy things happen, like Jenny and Marina getting it on in the bathroom the first time. I am devastated when sad things happen, like Bette finding Tina at home in the dark after the miscarriage. The show just makes me cry and cry. This past season, I am like a Bette with an Alice rising. The first season, I was more on the cusp of Dana and Jenny.
I love Shaneâ€™s hair. I love the haircut she gave Jenny. I love Aliceâ€™s last name. I love that Dana fired her manager. I love that Alice looked just like Julie from “The Love Boat.” I love that they go on Olivia cruises and to Dinah Shore. I love that it exists and I love that it makes me feel like I exist. Ilene gave a powerful acceptance speech about how our stories need to be told, and I am so grateful that she is the one doing it. I am also hoping that I will get to be on this show at some point, but more importantly, I am really looking forward to watching the new season, which starts in January. They all say it is the best one. Canâ€™t wait!!!